The local club is part of a much larger organization that I hadn't heard of until February, the United Federation of Doll Clubs. This is how becoming a member was explained to me, but I could be off on some points. You attend three local meetings. At the 3rd meeting the group votes on if you should be a member. If accepted, you now pay an annual fee of $40 to be in the club. If rejected - I have no clue what happens.
Meetings start at 11:00 am. The room was set up to seat about 25 people (16 were in attendance). There were banquet tables on either side and in front of the room. There was also a big flat screen TV in one corner. I'm going to relay how the meeting was run and then I'll give you my thoughts on it. This next part is strictly dry data:
11:00 - 11:30 Socializing and munchies
11:30 - 12:00 Secretary reads minutes of last meeting
Treasurer reports on funds
Old business is discussed
New business is discussed
Vote on new member
12:00 - 12:35 Member presentation on Tonner dolls
12:35 - 12:50 Socializing
12:50 - I actually left but people were still there.
Some pics and a very short video:
So, having attended, which I'm glad I did, I now know that this club is not for me. It was all very interesting, the ladies were quite welcoming and I really enjoyed the Tonner presentation. HOWEVER, because of my particular brand of neuroses, I found it ... 'uncomfortable' is the best word I can use.
The social aspect of it was more than I can handle. There was touching and bantering and mothering - all things a normal person wouldn't have a problem with. I have never claimed to be normal. I just want to see some dolls, do some crafts and call it a day. Too bad I can't walk into a group that's been in existence for over 25 years and say, "Look-a-here, ladies. Don't touch me, don't talk to me. Just show me your dolls and no one gets hurt."
Oh, well, it was an experience, but not one I want to repeat, unfortunately.
Hi Muff, you get big brownie points for going to the doll club meeting even though you knew it might be uncomfortable. I'm glad the members were welcoming and that you got to take lovely pictures of many beautiful dolls. You have so much creativity and humor to share that I am sure the members appreciated your presence. I enjoy your blog because it's like having a vicarious play date with a wonderful doll friend.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Limbe Dolls for the compliments!
DeleteI quite dislike being touched so I actually prepared as much as I could for a new group social situation. I wore a long sleeved shirt that went up to my neck and super lotioned my hands in case anyone wanted to shake. Most often, regardless of the situation, I tell people that I'm not a toucher when they stick their hands out. However, I'm overly engrained to make allowance for elders and I wasn't about to walk into a club and start making demands, even personal ones. Sometimes I have to suck it up and wash a lot after.
It's too bad it ended up being uncomfortable, but as you said, at least it was an experiences, right?
ReplyDeleteAnd you got some great photos to share with us! :)
Yes, jSarie, all-in-all I'm glad I still went so that I know what the group entailed and that I need something different for me.
DeleteApplause, yay! You went, tried it out, and decided it wasn't for you. Thanks for reporting back. I rather thought doll clubs run by UFDC would be more formal than I'd like. Seeing that schedule hmmm ... The food looks yummy, but I'd rather eat before or after a doll meeting. Food and dolls do not mix in my book ;-)
ReplyDeleteYou were fair to the doll club members. As Paulette (Limbe Dolls) writes, your creativity and humor make your blog a fun place to visit. You've got a cool community going here.
Aside: not to rule out doll clubs in your future. As you like it ;-)
D7ana, it's not so much that I minded the formality, although I could see the reading of the minutes getting old quickly, especially if you attended the previous meeting, but I need more hands on - craft wise - not touch wise, lol. Each month a different member does a presentation and that's fine but I would want more than to come every month just to watch something but not being able to actively participate in it. They probably do more than that and are active in the community and within the larger organization but.... yeah, it's not for me.
DeleteI am definitely not ruling out joining a doll club, just one that's more craft involved or one that is more structured toward the socialization of dolls instead of people socializing - if you know what I mean.
Glad you tried. Our small doll club is less formal. There are only 5 of us. We eat, talk, craft, eat some more, talk some more. We hang out until we're kicked out LOL. No we have fun and nothing is better than friends, dolls, & food. You'll know if/when you find the right group for you.
ReplyDeleteDollz4Moi, it sounds like you have a fun, relaxed group! Yep, that's what I'm looking for.
DeleteHello from Spain: I read that this event is not for you. You're a modern woman and you like to see the collections without pressure from others. I see pretty dolls but very antique. Keep in touch
ReplyDeleteZgadzam się z Martą. Nie wyobrażam sobie spotkania lalkowego z harmonogramem zachowań! To ma być przyjemne miejsce, gdzie każdy czuje się dobrze. Byłaś, zobaczyłaś i podjęłaś decyzję.
DeletePozdrawiam serdecznie!
Marta, now that you say that, many of the women were older than me and only one, the new member, collected Barbies. Everyone else was into antiques or smaller/bigger dolls.
DeleteOlla, myślę, że było oglądać zegar i dlatego wydawało się zbyt zaplanowane. Prawdopodobnie pomaga im się skupić i na miejscu, aby zaplanować spotkania w sekcjach chociaż.
Deletewell, you tried it and you didn't like it, that's perfectly fine. I can understand I'm not a hugger myself!
ReplyDeleteBut the dolls in display were cute!
Kisses Billa
Billa, I didn't get hugged per se, but two different women cupped my shoulders and it was jarring. One came up behind me and leaned over me while holding my shoulders. Later, another one came in front of me, grabbed my shoulders and leaned down really close to my face and said, "What? Are you too good to have a snack?!" She was smiling when she said it, but still..
DeleteSounds like it was worth a try at least. Doll clubs with socialising aren't my thing either, but that's what the Internet is for! The only downside is there's no buffet.
ReplyDeleteLOL, Anderson! You could always set yourself out a delicious spread before reading the internet.
DeleteLoved the video with the pretty pictures. The great thing is that you checked them out...curiosity killed the cat. Dolls clubs that are less formal are more fun! I wish you lived closer, I would love for you to come for a visit to my doll club.
ReplyDeleteGeorgia Girl, "and satisfaction brought it back." At least that's how I think the end of that cat phrase goes. I've started travelling to attend doll shows, so who knows, I might come to your area one day! LOL who am I kidding? I'm not driving more than 2.5 hours to get somewhere. I'm so lazy.
DeleteGroups have personalities and a lives.
ReplyDeleteI am willing to believe you weren't the first whose personality did not mesh with this club.
I don't like the voting part. What the heck is the criteria? You are there. You love dolls. Period. Then you pay your dues.
I have gone to churches where on the first visit I got more attention than Jesus. I hate that. Just let me come in and settle...get to know you...THEN maybe one day we might share a hug or two. Unless you are crying I wouldn't feel the need to hug a stranger LOL
Glad you tried it out. I am sure there is a club that is more suited to your personality and full of like minded folks. At least you will get some good eye-candy checking out the dolls, if you go visiting until you find the right group.
LOL, Grandmommy! Didn't like all that attention, huh? The voting was rather awkward but straightforward actually. Apparently the lady up for voting had filled out a questionnaire/form and she handed it in and then she was asked to say a little something about herself and what she collects. Then she was asked to leave the room and they did a "all in favor" and I guess it was unanimous, but I didn't glance around the room to see. She was let back in and they told her congratulations and everyone clapped. I did see in one of their books that to be a member you had to have a minimum of 10 dolls and attend at least 6 meetings a year and pay your dues.
DeleteNo, not to the point it is distracting and maybe intrusive or bombarded with a lot of questions i.e.where are you from (my accent is different), what is your home church, what town do you live-in, where do you work etc lol .BTW I enjoy church! Just like to worship in peace.
DeleteTouching? I don't mind socializing, but I don't like being touched by strangers. As others have said, you get points just for giving it a try. I agree with Georgia Girl that less formal clubs can be more fun. She and I are members of the same doll club. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteJewell, there was touching, patting, prodding, cupping of elbows and shoulders. There were no cheek-to-cheek touches or I would have balked at that. Touching my hand or any flesh for that matter is annoying, but my face? Never!
DeleteI haven't been back to Atlanta since 2004, I think. You never know, I might end up there again one day.
I applaud your willingness to put yourself out of your comfort zone by trying new things like going to this club or posing your doll outside in public.It's even better to know yourself well enough not to have to repeat an experience if you didn't enjoy it.
ReplyDeleteNice as these collectors seemed their club would be a bit too gradeschool "show and tell" for my tastes.I much prefer people like you who play around with their dolls and create with and for them.It's much more interesting and inspiring.
Hi, Maricha! I am old, crotchety and set in my ways but some things I'm willing to try at least once, especially if there are dolls involved. The ladies really were nice and if their format works for them then more power to them, but like you say, I do love to play and create.
DeleteThanks for sharing your experience with the doll club. Sometimes it is beneficial to exit our comfort zones to realize we are not missing anything on the other side.
ReplyDeleteI am a UFDC member by way of being an associate member of an out-of-state doll club that is affiliated with UFDC. My Motor City Doll Club membership entitles me to purchase any club dolls and event dolls offered to or by the club as well as my UFDC membership and subscription to UFDC's quarterly publication, Doll News. Could I join a local club and reap the same and more benefits? Yes, I could, but I too am not a social butterfly and prefer the solitude of my home. However, if a local club existed of collectors who share my doll preference and meetings and events were held where I could easily attend them, I'd join in a heartbeat.
dbg
Debbie, I didn't know UFDC did Doll News! Shows how much attention I paid.
DeleteI don't mind being social if the conversation or event is something I'm interested in. It's pretty cold to say that I don't want to delve into the personal lives of strangers, but there it is. It takes me a long time to warm up to someone in person. But, if I found a club that was about crafting for dolls, even if there was social shenanigans, I could at least be occupied and have a different focus than, "Why is she standing so close to me?"
Ah doll clubs. Miniature clubs are similar. I am not a member of the UFDC. I have been a member of the National Association of Miniature Enthusiasts (NAME) which is similar, you have to pay dues to belong to their clubs in their regions, be voted in, attend, etc. They read minutes but the club does a group project and is more crafty. I dropped out because it basically got to the point they wanted to attend the club meetings, show off their miniature 'finds' they acquired, and eat cookies. I didn't have time for that on a Sunday afternoon. Yes, they met in a church- but that didn't really bother me per se.Lots of these clubs meet in churches and you will find they have set presentations.
ReplyDeleteI have been encouraged to join but one reason I don't- is 1- I have done enough club work to last a charitable lifetime 2- I want to enjoy my hobby and not be bogged down with attending the meeting which ends up becoming work and chore.
And Muff, I applaud you for trying something new. Many of the reasons these types of meetings do not appeal is because, the types of dolls these ladies collect do not always appeal to the fashion doll collectors such as ourselves. Very few do or build dioramas. Most are into antique dolls and spend more on one antique doll than we would on a car. While I do belong to my Va. fashion doll club, those ladies are hard core vintage barbie and I enjoy sharing my dioramas with them, in many ways they don't 'get' me and I don't 'get' them- my focus is entirely on building versus perfect styled cabinets with perfect dustless dolls. I also have come to value just being with a few close friends who love diorama building and crafting too, so every now and then we get together and decide on a day and a project. One day we decided we wanted to do a nightclub theme so I built the night club and they brought dolls, props and we had fun staging, taking pictures and imagining what the dolls were doing- who was dating who, who was playing in the band and so on. Then we had snacks, pizza, looked up dolls on ebay, we just had fun the four of us. So you don't have to belong to a formalized club which can get stressful & a little boring. Find one or two three good friends and go from there.
Thanks that t reminds me to renew my NAME membership. I joined to know where a lot of the shows were and to get the magazine. I went to one club meeting and like Muff never went back.
DeleteLisa, it is entirely possible that the UFDC does a group project and I just happened to come in during a time when they are focused on member presentations - which they had scheduled up to September. This is one of the reasons I originally shied away from posting about them. Just because I was uncomfortable at this one two hour meeting doesn't mean they aren't active in other ways. I felt I couldn't be fair to them based on one meet up but I also knew I wouldn't be going back. If someone likes antique dolls, southern mannerisms and the social graces, this is the place for them. I'm just a hick heathen that likes to cut stuff up.
DeleteI will keep an eye out for other groups, but I'm starting to realize that as D7ana said, I've kinda built my own little community on my blog by sharing what interests me with like minded people.
Sorry that you felt uncomfortable. If it would make you feel better you aren't alone. I dont have neuroses but I do have autism. I cant handle random touching in a few areas especially the shoulders and back.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Leandra! It would be nice if more people would be aware that everyone isn't a toucher and to not be so familiar with strangers.
DeleteI've never gotten the impression (over the past 15 years or so) that the UFDC would be a group I'd like to be in. But it's great that you tried it. I hate walking into a new place where I'm the only one who doesn't know anyone else in the group.
ReplyDeleteBarb, it's totally weird, but I have no problems conversing with strangers or even striking up a conversation. I don't get anxious in that regard. If people would just keep their distance and understand the concept of 'personal space,' I would do alright.
DeleteOh, that sounds like unbearable hell! I would have run away much sooner. Luckily, there's the internet for people like us.
ReplyDeleteLOL, BlackKitty, I wouldn't go so far as to call it some new fresh hell, but yeah, the internet is more my speed.
DeleteMuff, you are such a hoot. I bet you are a ton of fun. I too love cutting things up and sometimes the box is just as much fun (or the styrofoam that comes with it) is just as great as the toy inside. The UFDC is a very social group. They do alot of luncheons, (you get a doll with your fee) or teas, (again, an outfit or a doll with a fee) and so on. Maybe not the doll you collect.
ReplyDeleteI guess growing up in the region I'm accustomed to touchy-feely sorts but they do get on your nerves and I myself don't tolerate them as well as I did when I was younger. One reason is my former job in security and for your own reasons- I too don't like people in my personal space either. It's also a tad intrusive to go up and hug people. At the Integrity convention I was taken around to meet some of the designers like David Butry and people wanted me to immediately 'hug' these people which embarrassed me and I refused - I don't hug strange people! (namely I don't want strange people hugging me!-LOL) but David understood about being put on the spot and was graceful about it. So I understand about the touching thing. Very awkward. I don't mind shaking hands but the hugging and kissy face is too much for me. I think it is hard for people to get together in a social setting without having to worry about that aspect of it. One reason I have begun to get away from the formalized clubs is when they discover you understand the procedures of how the club meetings have to be run, you suddenly get volunteered for everything and then it is no longer fun but work. It would be nice if everyone could just decide on a project to do and bring their items and work together, etc. but not everyone is as crafty as us. At the barbie club they wanted me to teach them to make cakes. I knew I was in trouble when they did not know what an exacto knife was! lol....nor what polymer clay was!
Hi again, Lisa! Sorry for this very late reply, but I was away for a doll show/vacation and have now returned.
DeleteI too don't have the tolerance I had for others when I was younger. I think I have always looked forward to the time when I could be that crotchety old lady yelling at kids to get off her lawn. Well, that time is now and I am that old lady. As a southerner, I have come to expect to get 'honey chiled' and 'darlined' and other sticky, overly familiar, endearments from strangers. Usually I would respond by calling them (women and men alike) 'honey lamb' or 'sugar dumpling' in a VERY sarcastic tone. Now I just say, "Well, aren't you very familiar!" and give them the up and down eyeball.
For a club, I would want to be in an environment where we foster each other's ideas. I absolutely don't mind teaching others something I've learned how to do because I basically do that with my blog. But in real life, when people start volunteering me to do stuff just because they know I have the skill set, it starts to feel like you are being taken advantage of so I get where you are coming from.
I just thought I'd add that even when you're simply curious about how a doll is packaged and what her features are,the internet is an improvement over this type of club event. I've never seen an in-person review of a doll be as thorough and interesting as those on toyboxphilosopher for example.
ReplyDeleteThat may be why all the clubs I know are,oddly enough, bigger on socializing than on letting you play with the actual objects being collected-the only exceptions to that are miniature train and Blythe doll collectors.
I could put up with touchy-feely people-I don't enjoy strangers invading my space but it's always been well-meaning so I bear with it, however, why a person would think they can touch my hair if they would object to me touching their doll's is crazy.
LOL, Maricha! People have been wanting to touch my hair for as long as I can remember and rarely do they ask first. I'm black with natural hair and sometimes it's in braids. I get people of all races wanting to touch it and ask me questions about it. It gets old fast.
DeleteOh, the touching. I cannot stand the touching if it's by someone I don't know. It seems so presumptuous, and because I am a devious kind of person, I am tempted to fake-sneeze on people when they get too close, or touch them back and be like... uh oh. Did I wash my hands after I went to the bathroom? Well, I'm pretty sure the rash isn't contagious... ;)
ReplyDeleteA craft-related doll meeting would be fun, though. Something where people would sit and chat... and not read minutes. The first writer's group I went to was formal, with planned out discussions, and I was not at all happy there. But I met some awesome people at a NaNoWriMo meeting five years ago, and we hit it off and formed our own group. We were really informal and spent a lot of the time looking at goofy videos on the internet. Nowadays we meet just to eat and gossip. :D
Sarah, I have never faked sneezed on someone to get out of being touched, lol, but that's an idea! I don't know though. With my luck they would probably then pat me on the back and ask if I was okay.
DeleteThe reading of minutes isn't necessarily a bad thing. I can see it being of benefit especially if you are only required to attend 6 meetings out of 12 and want to catch up on what you've missed. If you attended every meeting, that's when I could see it being tiring.
I completely understand not wanting to be touched. I hate that from strangers. I always feel like I just don't know where their hands have been. When I have to shake hands, I do it and then run to the bathroom to wash my hands. I also carry baby wipes with me for when I can get to a bathroom immediately.
ReplyDeleteWell, you gave it a go. Now you can say, "Veni, vidi, and then I was out!"
Janaiah, that's why I keep wet wipes either in my car or on my person. If I don't want to carry a bag then I put one in each pants pocket in a zip lock bag so I can discretely wipe my hands. People get upset if you whip out a wipe after they touch you. My mom likes those sanitizer gels, but I feel like if there isn't a cloth involved, you are just rolling smearing the filth around instead of wiping it away.
DeleteLOL, I definitely came, saw and got the freak out.
I know I'm late to the party, but I wanted to chime in. I used to be a member of UFDC back when I did porcelain dolls. I don't really ever remember attending any meetings. I definitely don't remember being voted in. That would have turned me off. I do remember there being a bunch of older ladies involved. How brave of you to step out of your comfort zone. I concur with the others. Once you find the right group, you will know. I'm not an overly touchy feely person, but once I was diagnosed, the comfort of a hug, even from a stranger was somehow soothing. Oddly enough I don't belong to any doll clubs but that is because I always feel like I don't have the time to do "extra" doll stuff because I rarely have enough time to do all the doll stuff I need to do. I do enjoy seeing all the doll people at our annual doll shows. I like to arrive when the show opens and leave when it closes. Gives me plenty of time to see all the doll people come and go. I guess you can say that's my personal informal doll club. The others don't know they are members. Lol.
ReplyDeleteHiya Vanessa! I'm late myself, lol. My schedule is sporadic at best so I did wonder about being able to adhere to a time frame for meetings, but I figured once a month might be doable. However, I was travelling so much these last weeks that I haven't even been able to blog much less do anything with my dolls. I'm thinking that doll shows two times a year might be more my speed as far as meet ups go. That way I can see what I want to see and eek out time for my fiddling and fussing when time allows.
Delete